THE LORD OF THE GEMS: CONCEPT

in the world of soyjak.party an evil necromancer named kuz forged the evil brimstone ring, capable of controlling the 17 gemeralds that were each given to the kings of the soyjaks, the cacaboreans, the gigaposters, and the /pol/tards, he used it to rule the world with his evil brimstone tranny army until he was defeated by a man named moot, however his spirit returned to the evil lands of DISCORD, where his army of shitskin discord trannies were turned into a massive army to force brimstone upon the sharty, but one day a humble soyteen named nate was given the ring by his uncle ventured out on a quest to travel to discord and destroy the ring, with the help of his loyal friend gapejak and the wizard cobson.

CAST:

frodo: nate
Bilbo: normal soyjak
Gollum: satoko/meximutt (instead of gollum gollum he says o algo)
Gandalf: cobson the grey/cobson the gem
Samwise gamgee: gapejak/wholesome soyjak
Sauron: kuz, (also known as admin 6).
Isildur: moot
Balrog: a really deformed slopjak (is killed by gandalf who soyquotes TND and says TOTAL NIGGER DEATH instead of you shall not pass)
Nazgul: namefags (hamas_2, kleki, joel, rye, marioman and terry crews, gandalf mocks them for being irrelevant)
Orcs: trannies
Uruk-hai:brown troonjaks
Saruman: pointing soyjak (he betrays the rest and becomes forced coal)
Witch king of angmar: joel
Legolas: babyjak
Aragorn: chudjak
Gimli: gigachad
Boromir: impjak
Faramir: nojak
Theoden: soot
Eowyn: soytan, she has a crush on chudjak 
Mouth of sauron: mymy (she's called the mouth of 'dmin 6 instead,) she gets decapitated by aragorn like in the movie
Mordor: baitcord
Isengard: the jarty
Denethor: froot
Elrond: doll
Theodred: flartson
Gothmog: Goth (creator of the impjak 'p video)
Ents: chicken factory creatures
Grima: FNF pedo
eagles: jannies
Merry: niggercow
Pippin: poog (the guinea pig)
One ring: brimstone ring (turns you invisible but slowly troons you out)
Gondor: /soy/
The shire: the shemmy
Rivendell: /caca/
Rohan: /raid/
Moria: soybooru
Galadriel: ruben sim

arwen will not appear because having chudjak getting married to a baby would be retarded and because arwen is 
Removed in most adaptations, fuck arwen

An adaptation of the hobbit seems possible but how on earth are we going to make a story about gigaposters?